abigail the woman who married the wrong man

God loved David and saw him, not as a rebellious slave, but as the future king of Israel.​—1 Sam. (a) What do you think were Abigail’s most appealing qualities? A woman doesn't know what to do about a man's interest. 13 When the emissaries reported back to David, he became furious. ABIGAIL saw the panic in the young man’s eyes. John Hagee - God said: Abigail the woman who married the wrong man. For whatever reason, she was married to Nabal, and she was determined to make the best of a difficult situation. Remember, many marriages in Bible times were arranged. 16:1, 2, 11-13) On the run from the jealous and murderous King Saul, David was dwelling in the wilderness with his 600 loyal warriors. (See also footnote.). How did Abigail show courage and discretion in dealing with her husband’s insult of David? Abigail May Alcott Nieriker (July 26, 1840 – December 29, 1879) was an American artist and the youngest sister of Louisa May Alcott.She was the basis for the character Amy (an anagram of May) in her sister's semi-autobiographical novel Little Women (1868). 15, 16. 14 In a way, we have already seen Abigail take the first step toward righting this terrible wrong. Abigail, a wise woman in ancient Israel, provides an example of the power of an apology, although her apology was for a wrong that her husband had committed. (b) Why was Abigail’s course not a case of rebelling against her husband’s rightful headship? Did Abigail’s parents favor this marriage, even arrange it, because they were impressed with Nabal’s wealth and prominence? He had acted cruelly and insolently, as usual. ^ par. 16 Does this mean that Abigail was rebelling against her husband’s rightful headship? Nabel sheared his sheep but insulted David when he asked him to share some sheep with his army. She could not tell him now though. 15 Abigail thought and acted quickly. Abigail (Hebrew: אֲבִיגַיִל ‎, avigáyil, ’ǎḇîḡayil) was married to Nabal; she became married to the future King David after Nabal's death (1 Samuel 25). On her own initiative she took food and rode to meet David. 22. 25:36. Right at that moment, some 400 warriors were on the way, determined to kill off every male in the household of Nabal, Abigail’s husband. (December-10-2020) Published in John Hagee. Abigail---The Woman Who Married the Wrong Man. What further blessing came to Abigail, and how did she show that her new prospects did not change her? David also chose his words with care, using polite terms and forms of address. She expressed her trust in David as Jehovah’s representative, recognizing that he was fighting “the wars of Jehovah.” She also indicated that she knew of Jehovah’s promise regarding David and the kingship, for she said: “Jehovah . In those days, it was Jehovah’s purpose for the descendants of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob to dwell in that land. Why? 2. Nabal was “harsh  and bad in his practices.” A bully and a drunkard, he was widely feared and disliked.​—1 Sam. 25:12, 13, 21, 22) David’s ire was understandable, but his way of expressing it was wrong. Women in the Bible​—What Can We Learn From Them. Sexual freedom--understand your body is not your own. Last month I wrote an article for HuffPost Divorce about my research that revealed 30% of divorced women knew they were marrying the wrong guy on their wedding day. Tamar: The Sex Scandal---The Portrait of God's Grace, LESSON 2 Mindset of a woman--Study Questions, Abigail---The Woman Who Married the Wrong Man. 14. By Abigail … (b) What will we learn about this remarkable woman? On the contrary, they were like a protective wall around Nabal’s flocks and servants. “Gird on every one his sword!” he commanded. 6 Some today might wonder why such an intelligent young woman married such a good-for-nothing man. David chose the moment wisely. In contrast, Abigail lived in Carmel in the north of Israel as the wife of a rich man named Nabal. Right at that moment, some 400 warriors were on the way, determined to kill off every male in the household of Nabal, Abigail’s husband. 8 Nabal had just made Abigail’s situation harder than ever. 17 Before long, Abigail met up with David and his men. Imitate Their Faith. She realized her husband’s refusal to give gifts unto David’s men endangered her whole household. Literal Standard Version. 7 Wise parents carefully teach their children a wholesome view of marriage. It had all started with Nabal. (a) David and his men were struggling to survive in what setting? At any rate, Nabal’s money did not make him a fit husband. 5, 6. Protecting it from foreign invaders and marauding bands was thus a form of sacred service. In these regions David and his men struggled to survive, no doubt hunting for their food and enduring many hardships. Copyright © 2021 Watch Tower Bible and Tract Society of Pennsylvania. 25:39-42. Evidence showed that Antoine, who was convicted of federal wire fraud charges, had googled “rape by deception” and had visited Short’s website. In this case, she had to put submission to her God ahead of submission to her husband. (1 Sam. They often encountered the young men who worked as shepherds for the wealthy Nabal. “He screamed rebukes at them” is how the young man mentioned at the outset described the scene to Abigail. Neither man had Jehovah’s view. 6:1). What happened to Nabal, and what can we learn about all cases of domestic tyranny or abuse? 7. 7. Did they feel pressured by poverty? Sheep and shepherds faced plenty of dangers. He even referred to himself as “your son David,” perhaps a respectful acknowledgment of Nabal’s greater age. 25:38) With that righteous execution, Abigail’s long nightmare of a marriage was over. Nabal’s view may have been similar to that of Saul, who hated David. DEAR ABBY: I'm someone who doesn't get noticed often by the opposite sex. In what ways would you like to imitate the faith of Abigail? Stop manipulating the other with sex (read 1Cor. How did Abigail approach David, what did she say, and what made her words effective? 19 And how did David respond? Abigail courageously told Nabal what she had done to save his life. (1 Sam. 20 After she took her leave, Abigail could not help thinking  about that meeting; nor could she have failed to notice the contrast between that faithful, kind man and the brute to whom she was married. Santamaria’s astonishing detective work reveals the surprising truth behind Lewis’s description of the couple as ‘a sinful woman married to a sinful man,’ even as she portrays their late-life love affair as salvational to them both.” —Megan Marshall, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Margaret Fuller: A New American Life Back in 1 Samuel 15 Saul’s disobedience caused God to reject him as king. DEAR DAZED & CONFUSED: You may not want to feel anything for this married man, but you do. Unlike most other women in the Old Testament, Abigail is also described as “intelligent” (NAB, NIV, TEV), or “clever” (NRSV), or “of good understanding” (KJV, ASV), etc. We read: “Later Abigail came in to Nabal.” Yes, she returned to her husband as determined as ever to carry out her role as his wife to the best of her ability. 12 He was outraged! 31:10-31) She sent the provisions ahead with some of her servants, then followed alone. 1-3. So one day David sent ten messengers to Nabal to ask for help. Don't date a deadbeat who does not work, 7 Biblical requirements to maintain or restore marriages, 2. We all marry the wrong person. Granted, the man had money. He accepted what Abigail had brought and said: “Blessed be Jehovah the God of Israel, who has sent you this day to meet me! “Please, let your slave girl speak in your ears”. 5 Abigail was altogether different from Nabal. Again she hastened, this time to descend from her donkey and humble herself before David. Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Would you like to read this article in %%? A little while ago Stephen Altrogge wrote a small article he titled So You Think You’ve Married the Wrong Person and today I would like to add one thing to the discussion. A true warrior is loyal and faithful, thinking of others before themselves. 25:37. His very name means “Senseless,” or “Stupid.” Did his parents give him such a name at birth, or was it an epithet that stuck to him later? “His heart came to be dead inside him, and he himself became as a stone.” Perhaps he had suffered some form of stroke. 21 Again showing both courage and discretion, she waited until the next morning when the influence of the wine had ebbed. Why? The man he had insulted was none other than David. 7:36) However, it was too late for Abigail to think about such things. Four times in this one account we find the same verb, “to hasten,” used regarding this woman. Instead, he just sat there, not moving.​—1 Sam. She also had to tell him​—before he learned of it elsewhere, to his even greater shame—​about the danger that had been averted. But as Abigail helped and supported David along life’s road, eventually bearing him a son, she learned that she had a husband who valued her and protected her. (1 Sam. 3 First, let us learn a little more about this remarkable woman. Unlike her husband, Nabal, she proved willing to listen. A man named Mario Ambrose Antoine had posed as a porn producer to persuade dozens of women to have sex with him under the false pretense of them auditioning for porn films. * Those towns lay amidst grassy uplands suitable for raising sheep, of which Nabal owned 3,000. “Here is your slave girl,” she responded, “as a maidservant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord.”. How had this crisis arisen? If that sounds familiar, you have likely married the wrong person. It would be difficult to find a Bible character who is spoken of in more contemptuous terms. Kind, moving words! What can we learn from Abigail’s difficult marital situation? 23. (b) What practical lesson might we learn from the contrast between Nabal and Abigail? This time, though, he had insulted the wrong man​—the beloved commander of a loyal and well-trained band of warriors. Abigail, a wise and prudent woman, met David as he and his men were approaching. Gen 29:25: And it came to pass, that in the morning, behold, it was Leah. The story of Abigail in the Bible is an interesting one for many reasons. Who was Abigail? 1 Samuel 25 tells us that Abigail was an intelligent and beautiful woman married to a hard, mean, cruel man named Nabal. 23 Besides the release from a bad marriage, Abigail had another blessing in store. Then we read again of her hastening, this time to ready herself to go to David.​—1 Sam. But the young man knew Abigail to be different, which is no doubt why he approached her with this problem. The account tells us: “Jehovah struck Nabal, so that he died.” (1 Sam. (1 Cor. When he learned of the death of Nabal, David sent messengers to propose marriage. All around, though, was wild country. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. We haven't had any physical contact other than the daily interaction. How did Abigail speak sensibly and persuasively to David? 14 The phrase the young man used literally means “a son of belial (worthlessness).” Other Bible renderings of this sentence include a description of Nabal as a man “who won’t listen to anyone” and the conclusion, “it is no good talking to him.”. (a) In what way did Abigail take the first step toward righting the wrong that Nabal had committed? Hagee is the founder and National Chairman of the Christian-Zionist organization Christians United for Israel. (a) What do you find admirable about Abigail’s willingness to return to her husband? What made her words effective? 17, 18. All too often, a person blessed with outward beauty fails to see the need to develop such qualities as discretion, wisdom, courage, or faith. How did Nabal respond?​—1 Sam. 4 Abigail and Nabal were not a good match. He was feasting like a king and was as drunk as could be.​—1 Sam. 6:4), 4. NABAL AND ABIGAIL: THE WOMAN WHO MARRIED THE WRONG MAN I Samuel 25:1-13 Return to Famous Couples Index Page Before Reading the Passage (This Carmel is not the Carmel of Elijah.) 8. (b) What was wrong with the way Nabal responded to David’s message? The Bible praises her for her discretion as well as for her beauty.​—Read 1 Samuel 25:3. Subscribe and Get Sermons and Live Streams by John & Matt Hagee DIRECTLY TO YOUR INBOX! It included bread, wine, sheep, roasted grain, cakes of raisins, and cakes of figs. She was originally the wife of Nabal, an evil man who disrespected David. While dwelling in the wilderness, David, who later became king of Israel, together with his men protected the flock that belonged to Abigail ’s husband, Nabal. Still, she approached and told him the whole story. 23 Besides the release from a bad marriage, Abigail had another blessing in store. If Abigail failed to act, might she become a sharer in her husband’s guilt? On one occasion he even rescued her from kidnappers! > The Woman Who Married the Wrong Man. Not so with Abigail. 18 She took responsibility for the problem and asked David to forgive her personally. It would have been easy for them to help themselves to a sheep now and then, but they did nothing of the kind. . To the south lay the vast wilderness of Paran. The story of David’s second wife of note, Abigail, is told in 1 Samuel 25. But it's messing with my emotions. David was already married to Ahinoam, and though God permitted polygamy, it surely presented special challenges to faithful women back then. “When the Lord has … (See Chapter 10.) John Hagee (May-18-2020) Sermons: Abigail The Woman Who Married The Wrong Man . 19. She was named after her mother, Abigail May, and first called Abba, then Abby, and finally May, which she asked to be … He ridiculed David as inconsequential and compared him to a runaway servant. She realistically acknowledged that her husband was as senseless as his name implied, perhaps suggesting that it would be beneath David’s dignity to chastise such a man. Unlike Nabal, Abigail proved willing to listen. She married Nabel, a rich but evil man. Clearly, Abigail knew well what she had and was thoroughly in charge of her household responsibilities, much like the capable wife later described in the book of Proverbs. (b) Why might Abigail have married such a good-for-nothing man? Published 12:32 am EST, Wednesday, December 30, 2020 (Prov. (See also paragraph 10 footnote.). He was terrified​—and for good reason. She is the author of Transitions: How Women Embrace Change and Celebrate Life and other books. “Go up in peace to your house,” he told her, and he humbly added: “I have listened to your voice.”​—1 Sam. Raise your children by the law of God, 6. *. 7:4). But what could one woman do against an army? Predators abounded, and Israel’s southern border was so close that bands of foreign marauders and thieves frequently attacked. But she did not dwell on such thoughts. 20, 21. 9, 10. 25:32-35. Let’s back up for a minute here. When he learned of the death of Nabal, David sent messengers to propose marriage. He had a right to know. Help! (a) How did David initially respond to Nabal’s insult? 2 It had all started with Nabal. This was the faithful servant of Jehovah whom Samuel the prophet had anointed, revealing David as God’s choice to succeed Saul as king. I know it's wrong, and he hasn't promised anything. Husbands love your wives as Christ love the Church. 25:18, 19. 11, 12. 10 David likely felt that protecting the local landowners and their flocks was a service to Jehovah God. In most weddings vows, we repeat words like, “I take you to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse...” How did David respond to Abigail’s words, and why did he praise her? 24 This was no fairy-tale ending; Abigail’s life with David would not always be easy. . He had acted cruelly and insolently, as usual. Some of you your morning came when I taught you how to find a husband or wife the Biblical way and others after getting into marriage, their morning comes and they realize they have married the wrong person. The Bible says: “Man’s wrath does not work out God’s righteousness.” (Jas. 11 It must have been quite an undertaking to keep all those men fed in the wilderness. (b) What was Abigail determined to do? “At once Abigail hastened,” we read. DEAR ABBY: I'm someone who doesn't get noticed often by the opposite sex. 1:20) How, though, could Abigail save her household? ^ par. David promised to kill Nabel and all 1st born. 2 A certain man in Maon, who had property there at Carmel, was very wealthy. He had a thousand goats and three thousand sheep, which he was shearing in Carmel. She was the wife of Nabal, an ungodly husband. 9 Nabal lived in Maon but worked and likely owned land in  nearby Carmel. (1 Sam. By Abigail W. Leonard 02 ... Women seem to judge potential mates by ... for explaining how Pitt and Clooney managed to snag People Magazine's "Sexiest Man … PRIVACY POLICY, https://assetsnffrgf-a.akamaihd.net/assets/m/1102013255/univ/art/1102013255_univ_sqr_xl.jpg, https://assetsnffrgf-a.akamaihd.net/assets/a/ia/E/wpub/ia_E_lg.jpg, Share While Jehovah does not step in with miraculous executions today, this account is a fitting reminder that no case of domestic tyranny or abuse escapes his notice. 25:17) Tragically, Nabal’s view of his own importance rendered him unwilling to listen. Grave danger loomed. (Read 1 Samuel 25:24-31.) 25:10, 11, 14. 25:20, 23) Then she poured out her heart at length, making a powerful plea for mercy in behalf of her husband and her household. 9 This was not the famous Mount Carmel far to the north where the prophet Elijah later had a showdown with the prophets of Baal. Here’s what I didn’t understand until recently: We all marry the wrong person. Imitate Their Faith, Audio download options (b) What light does the principle recorded at James 1:20 shed on David’s reaction? She had to tell him of the gift she had given to David and his men. To the east, the approach to the Salt Sea led through desolate wastelands riddled with ravines and caves. Her marriage gave her considerable social standing, judging by the fact that she had five maidservants (1 Samuel 25:42). 25:2, 3, 17, 21, 25. Dear Abby: Attentions from married man play with woman's emotions. This time, though, he had insulted the wrong man —the beloved commander of a loyal and well-trained band of warriors. They neither urge their children to marry for money nor pressure them to begin dating when still too young to take on adult roles and responsibilities. This statistic triggered much consternation and denial. No doubt she expected him to explode in fury, perhaps violence. The problem is, I am getting that attention from a man … Abigail faced what challenges in her new life, but how did her husband and her God view her? If you are unfamiliar with the story from the book of 1 Samuel, Nabal was a wealthy and great man in Maon, yet his name meant fool, a part he played well. After wading through hundreds of comments bashing the institution of marriage, doubts about my methodology, and nasty remarks about women… John Slater/Getty Images. Miserly Nabal complained loudly about his precious bread, water, and slaughtered meat. Abigail was a woman who knew God. “But,” we read, “to her husband Nabal she told nothing.”​—1 Sam. And David was not yet king; there would be obstacles and hardships to surmount before he served Jehovah in that way. He would be sober enough to understand her, yet possibly more dangerous in his temper as well. Now, one of Nabal’s young workmen, perhaps a shepherd, came to Abigail, trusting that she would come up with a plan to save them. 30:1-19) David thus imitated Jehovah God, who loves and values such discreet, courageous, and faithful women. He was married to Abigail, who is described as a woman of good understanding and a beautiful countenance. Apr 25, 2013 - Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube. So when I do receive attention, it's a very nice feeling. Or, rather, we marry people for reasons that don’t really pan out over the long haul. For one, Nabal is a rather bizarre character. Abigail Brenner, M.D., is a psychiatrist in private practice. He vowed to wipe out every male in Nabal’s household. She Acted With Discretion, Publication download options certainly will commission you as leader over Israel.” Further, she urged David not to take any action that might bring bloodguilt upon him or that might later become “a cause for staggering”​—evidently referring to a troubled conscience. In his own time, he will always bring about justice.​—Read Luke 8:17. As for bringing the matter to Nabal, the young servant said of him: “He is too much of a good-for-nothing fellow to speak to him.” * (1 Sam. That’s okay. Nabel's name acutally means "fool". However, about ten days later, his end came​—and not strictly for medical reasons. (a) What should parents today avoid if they want to teach their children a wholesome view of marriage? And blessed be your sensibleness, and blessed be you who have restrained me this day from entering into bloodguilt.” David praised her for bravely hastening to meet him, and he acknowledged that she had restrained him from incurring bloodguilt. The man's name was Nabal, … -- DAZED & CONFUSED. A Guide For The New Year Psalm 23; ... 3 Now the name of the man was Nabal; and the name of his wife Abigail: and she was a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance: but the man was churlish and evil in his doings; and he was of the house of Caleb. Arming himself, David led 400 of his men to attack. 25:5-8. “Here is your slave girl,” she responded, “as a maidservant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord.” Clearly, she was not changed by the prospect of  becoming David’s wife; she even offered to be a servant to his servants! (b) Why should Nabal have appreciated what David and his men had been doing? In his anger, David planned to attack and kill Nabal and all his household. (Read 1 Samuel 25:15, 16.) He thus saw himself as very important, but how did others view him? She prepared a generous gift for David and his men. No; keep in mind that Nabal had acted wickedly against an anointed servant of Jehovah, an action that could well result in death for many innocent members of Nabal’s household. Nabal could hardly have chosen a better spouse, whereas Abigail found herself married to one who could hardly have been worse. Her name means “My Father Has Made Himself Joyful.” Many a father is proud to have a beautiful daughter, but a wise father is far happier to discern inner beauty in his child. Children obey your parents for this is right (Eph. Whom had Nabal insulted, and why would you say that this was most unwise? Such arrogance is all too common even to this day. Dear Abby: I shouldn’t have crush on the married guy, but I can’t help it The man is giving a lot of attention to a woman who seldom receives it.  |  Thursday, 10 December 2020 02:22 . (a) How did Abigail show that she was like the capable wife described in the book of Proverbs? If not, parental consent was still of great importance. Do not date anyone who consumes anger, 4. And the name of the man [is] Nabal, and the name of his wife [is] Abigail, and the woman [is] of good understanding, and of beautiful form, and the man [is] hard and evil [in his] doings; and he [is] a Calebite. (a) How did David show tact and respect in his message to Nabal? (a) How did danger come to loom over Abigail’s household? She was a wise woman–by disobeying her husband, she saved his life, for David would have slain him. NET Bible. Love your wive as you love your own body and wives reverence your husbands. This Carmel was a town at the edge of the southern wilderness. It was the festive time of sheepshearing, when generosity and feasting were customary. Jeanne Phillips, as Abigail Van Buren. John Hagee (December-10-2020) God said: Abigail the woman who married the wrong man. I don't want to feel anything for him, but I can't help it. And what can we learn from her example of faith? The husband is the spiritual leader of the home (Eph. 10 How did those hardworking soldiers treat the shepherds? Imitate Their Faith, Share 13. John Charles Hagee (born April 12, 1940) is the founder and senior pastor of Cornerstone Church, a megachurch in San Antonio, Texas. She was an intelligent and beautiful woman, but her husband was surly and mean in his dealings—he was a Calebite. 3 His name was Nabal and his wife’s name was Abigail. TERMS OF USE (b) How did Abigail show courage and discretion in choosing the time to talk to Nabal? 24. Online: In either case, he lived up to his name. ^ par. Background: Abigail was a beautiful woman of good understanding. 22 What was wrong with the man? He realized he has got the wrong woman, the wrong spouse. Abigail was “an intelligent and beautiful woman” (1 Samuel 25:3) who saved her husband and his household, prevented David from doing something rash, and secured an unexpected future for herself.

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